RamsFootball.com

Surprise, Surprise !

“I have to confess that I surprised myself when Marc Bulger was sacked and got crunched yesterday.

I mean, usually I only jump out of my chair and holler, “”YES!!!!”" like that when something good happens to the Rams.

But yesterday, I think I was affected by the pent-up frustration of watching Bulger do his thumbsucking brain-fart act for 12 weeks — and I was tired of his forty yard flutter-balls in the Rams’ formerly-effective vertical passing game.

It’s not that I think he’s bad, he’s just been in a foggy cloudbank for several months.

And I, frankly, was dying to see what kind of difference Gus Frerotte could make, and I knew Bulger getting injured was my best (only?) chance that Scott “”Old Tightpockets”" Linehan would give Gus a shot. I mean, if five losses in a row, capped off by a shutout doesn’t get Bulger benched, what will?

Anyhow, Gus came in cold, threw a couple of rockets with no time left and got the Rams in position for a last-second half-time field goal that ultimately was the margin of victory, while Bulger was pouting on the sideline because Coach kept him out for a couple of plays. Boo hoo.

After doing nothing but kill drives with bad passes through the entire second half, Linehan had Bulger on a short leash during the do-or-die drive, throwing nothing but check-downs to Steven Jackson and Stephen Davis, a come-back route to Isaac Bruce on the sideline, one medium range shot to Torry Holt up the middle and a goal line grass-cutter that Kevin Curtis managed to scoop up for the best reception of the entire game. We got that final touchdown because Jackson is as tough as a combat boot and the receivers have good hands and Bulger seems OK on the short stuff, true, but mostly, because the Whiners are as bad at playing The Prevent as the Rams are at stopping The Run.

Winning is better than losing, for sure, but I have no illusions. The Ram players still aren’t buying the system and the coach isn’t about to change it. They could go 0-5 to close out this pitiful season, and as much as I’ll hate watching it, the prospects for April can only improve. I just hope nobody else gets injured. The Rams have taken more than their fair share of hits this season, and their lineup is thinner than Linehan’s Christmas bonus.

©2006 LA Bob

“

Posted in LA Bob | No Comments »

Guesswork

“What will become of the 2006 Rams is now anybody’s guess.

Head Coach Scott Linehan is obviously just guessing. His guess that the Rams could shoot holes in the Carolina Panthers’ pass defense using a decision-challenged quarterback, a patchwork offensive line and several receivers with wooden fingers was, um, wrong. Some of us guessed that Linehan would remember an earlier guess where he thought the Rams would balance the attack and run Steven Jackson. We guessed wrong. Linehan didn’t remember.

I, personally, guessed that Isaac Bruce’s first dropped pass against the Panthers would be his last. Bamp. Wrong. I also guessed that Linehan would remember his own words:

“People need to remember that Todd Steussie went to the Pro Bowl as a left tackle in this League”

and put Steussie in there at LT, sliding Adam Goldberg in someplace else. Another bad guess on my part. Goldberg went in for the missing-in-action Orlando Pace who inconveniently tore a tricep while pushing on some air the week before, while the Rams were losing to Seattle (who lost to the Whiners on Sunday — I don’t know anybody who guessed right on that one). As a result of Goldberg getting thoroughly creamed on a regular basis, the indecisive thumbsucker with the going-nowhere football in his right hand (and the number 10 on his bumbling, stumbling, fumbling back) did what he usually does under pressure: brain-lock and crumble.

A short list of my other wrong guesses:

Jim Haslett would find a way to cover Steve Smith.

The Rams’ defensive front 8 would stop the run.

The Rams’ defensive front 8 would rush Jake Delhomme effectively and get some killer sacks and takeaways.

The Rams would get to .500 and still be alive for a wildcard.

Bamp. Wrong on all of the above.

Right now, I think I am through guessing about 2006. My expectations for the Rams are probably pretty low right now but I don’t know for sure because I have hunted high and low, attic and basement, under the bed and behind the garage, and for the life of me I can’t find those consarned expectations anywhere. It’s like they vanished, but I can’t exactly say that because that would be guessing, and like I said before, I’m through guessing.

I ‘ll probably just grab the newspaper, a ham sandwich and a seat cushion and take a number in the lobby of the Miracle Department. If the Rams have a snowball’s chance of getting in the playoffs, that’s probably where I’ll find it.

I know one thing that nobody has to guess about. They’re not going to find much on the football field.

And another thing: lose those silly white pants for crying out loud. Our football team is circling the bowl and they are schlocking around with fashion choices.

Good grief.

©2006 LA Bob

“

Posted in LA Bob | No Comments »

NFC Worst

“Well, let’s see.

This week would ordinarily mark the “Big Game” in the Western Division of the National Football Conference, between the Greatest Show on Turf and the Seasquawks of Seattle.

Not this time, folks.

For one thing, the Greatest Show has fired its Ringmaster and hired a former circus train mechanic to do the job. The new guy seems reliable enough, and conscientious, and dots and crosses all the appropriate letters, i, j, t, etc. This train will no longer get derailed with brilliant planning followed by stupid steersmanship, but it does seem to take a bit too long getting out of the station every week, as it were.

A case in point: last week the Rams lost to the mediocre-at-best Kansas City Chiefs, chugging their way to a 14 point deficit before getting up to speed, after which they barely managed to keep abreast of the Chiefs, losing by the same 14 points. The week before that, the Rams proved they could do it on the road, too, giving the San Diego Chargers a 14 point lead and losing by, you guessed it, 14.

Seattle comes into this week’s game way up in first place and will hang on to it even if they lose to the Rams. They are short their starting quarterback, Matt Hasselbeck, and their whizbang MVP running back Shaun Alexander, but that’s not likely to matter much. Last week KC’s Trent Green was still on the bench, looking out his earhole and wondering what day it was, and his team still managed to squash the Rams like a bug.

Even with their mouthy tight end Jeremy Stevens prancing around and kneeing people in the crotch and thinking he’s the cutest thing since Freddie Mercury, the Squawks should have no trouble beating the Rams under their custom-made giant twin-tin-can pain-amplifiers (only thinly disguised as customer shelters). Due to those infernal and insulting contraptions — and the fact that Microsoft employees are forbidden to yell at the office — the Seattle ballpark is the loudest in the NFL, indoors or out. The Dome at America’s center used to be pretty loud, too, back when the fans believed and weren’t offing their tickets to brokers to sell to Chiefs fans. Last week, Marc Bulger went to a silent snap count in his own stadium after a fresh batch of false start penalties, mostly by the 2005 Penalty King of the NFL, Alex Barron, due to the noise in the Dome. The KC QB was calling audibles over center.

Pathetic. Reminds me of why the Rams got outta Dodge, er, Los Angeles.

I can’t get excited about this one. No matter who wins, they will only be the best team in the 8th best division in the league.

The NFC Worst.

©2006 LA Bob

“

Posted in LA Bob | No Comments »